Romans 12:9 says, "Love must be sincere." Recently, I've seen several demonstrations of insincere love. Insincere love on the surface looks like love and sounds like love, but it doesn't feel like love to the recipient of this 'love'. What I've seen demonstrated was a mean spirit, manipulation and control, masked in a cloak of "niceness". The actions looked good, the words sounded good, but the spirit behind it was not good. It was not love. And the result is a tearing down of trust and relationship, rather than a growing mutual love and respect.
I want to love sincerely. I don't want to hurt anyone with an insincere love. I want the love I demonstrate to others to be real. I want to love the way God loves, with the kind of love described in 1 Corinthians 13...
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
The only way I can consistently love like this is with God's love. It's His Spirit in me that can love others with a sincere love, consistently. I need to get myself out of the way and let Him love through me. And for me, that's not always easy.